What's Wrong With Me Today? (EvErYtHiNg!)

When your a young girl your mom hands you a toy. This toy becomes the thing you most play with. The toy for me was barbie. When I was a little kid I used to play with barbie because she was perfect in everyway, she had a skinny body, a big chest, perfectly toned legs, the perfect boyfriend (Ken) and of course that always awesome looking hair. As I grew up I started to see myself has having to be barbie because just as most girls I went through puberty and all the sudden cared what I looked like. Everytime I looked in the mirrror I saw something wrong but I would never let myself be mad about it or fix it because I am what I am and no one can judge me unless I let that in. Unfortunately I would see my friends not have the same attitude as me. Everytime you took your bathroom partner (for some reason girls can't go to the bathrooms by themselves!) they would look in the mirror and try to fix the hair, make up, talk about boys and be all stereotypical, they had become morphed into this socially conformed clone of one another that I couldn't tell who my real friends were anymore. In class we watched doves campaign for real beauty. This is what little girls watch, not these sexed up version of what a woman is supposed to be. Everytime I go anywhere I am confronted with that sexed up version of what a woman is. Its everywhere from ads to television to movies and to even the terrible rap videos. I refuse to give into the mainstream culture of rap and hiphop because on every video there are at least 20 girls mostly naked, but clothed enough to not be a porno. Everytime I hear a behind the music of the rappers convicted or found innocent of rape or abuse of woman it turns me off to that kind of gangster lifestyle. Everyday it kills me to see all these boys try and look and act like gangsters. FACE IT BOYS YOU LIVE IN AN UPPER MIDDLE CLASS SOCIETY AND YOU ARE WHITE!!!! My fear is that one day that these guys i've grow up with will just become another statistic of abusing or raping a woman. I also fear that my friendss that try so hard to be this perfect image of beauty that they will never be happen with themselves and that they may become a victim of rape or abuse. Every girl boy and girl in high school should be forced to take a class and how your shaped as a human being to act and show them what true beauty is not this sexed up version.